Aging Well Podcast
The "Aging Well Podcast" is about, well...aging. It's for people of all ages who are interested in aging successfully. The topics include the Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Social dimensions of wellness as they relate to living as well and as long as possible, as well as the financial, legal, and housing questions that everyone has about aging well. Do you have a question you want answered or topic you want discussed on the "Aging Well Podcast"? Send us an email to agingwell.podcast@gmail.com or record your question for us to use in an upcoming episode at following link: Record a message
Aging Well Podcast
Episode 182: Following Sunshine--A Path to Aging Well w/ Niamh McAnally
In this episode, Dr. Armstrong takes an inspiring journey with Niamh McAnally, author of Following Sunshine: A Voyage Around the Mind, Around the World, Around the Heart. Described by Liam Neeson as "a truly brave, enriching memoir," this episode takes you on an epic global adventure of aging well. Niamh shares the fascinating story behind her book, explores how her travels influenced her perspective on aging and personal growth, and discusses the concept of "following sunshine" in the context of well-centered fitness. Tune in for practical tips on self-discovery, mindfulness, and maintaining health while traveling, as well as memorable stories from Niamh's transformative experiences. Discover how writing this memoir has changed her outlook on life and aging and hear her advice for anyone feeling stuck or uninspired.
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Welcome to the Aging Well podcast. I'm Jeff Armstrong here with Corbin Bruton. In this and the episodes that follow, we will share candid discussions on aging and hear from the experts. We are here to inform and encourage as we experience, well, aging. Liam Neeson describes the book as, quote, a truly brave, enriching memoir that will take you on a global adventure, end quote. In this episode, we are joined on an epic global adventure of aging well with Nia McEnally, the author of Following Sunshine, a voyage around the mind, around the world, around the heart.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Well, Niamh, welcome to the Aging Well podcast. I normally begin these interviews by asking our guests to tell us a little about themselves. Yours is a really fascinating story that's told in your memoir, Following Sunshine: A Voyage Around the Mind, Around the World, Around the Heart. When I read the line, I knew my life would become the sum of my thoughts. My experience would become the result of my choices, I knew I would enjoy your story. So without revealing too much, can you introduce yourself and share a little about the journey that led to the creation of the book?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:thank you so much for inviting me on your podcast. It's lovely to be with you. And yes, I'm from Ireland originally, and I started traveling. My first event overseas was at 12 years of age. And when my parents took me to Spain for a little holiday, but then I started traveling then from about just after 17 years of age, and I've been traveling ever since. One of the reasons that the book Following Sunshine came into being was part of the journey of going on these as a volunteer. And the life lessons I learned as we went along,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:how did your travels around the world influence your perspective on aging and personal growth?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Great question. Um, One of the things that I've really learned from that in terms of how we age is Yeah, part, partly I kind of think, well, my mind is ready to go. Not always is my body like still up to speed to do some of this stuff. But I think part of it was for me was that I learned never, never put something off, never put off a dream to do it today. that's all we have. I mean, there is only now and there isn't a tomorrow until we know we're in today. that I think that. As I get older, I think that's one of the most important things for me when a notion pops in my head, I act on it. You know, when you're younger, you kind of go, yeah, that'll be something I'll do tomorrow I've got time. And we didn't have any more time then than we have now. It still could have been our final days on earth, but I think the closer we get, as we're aging, the more we realize, Oh Lordy, we should do these things.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:How do you define the concept of aging? Following sunshine in the context of what I tend to refer to and we refer to a lot on this podcast as well centered Fitness, which is the spiritual the physical intellectual the emotional and social wellness.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:For me. As you, it starts in the mind, which is the whole first part of my book, which is a voyage around the mind it's a mindset I was very lucky to learn early on in my life, that anything is possible and you can create your own existence and your own reality and the life you want to lead. That's not to say, you can sit back and it's the entire law of attraction. You sit back and wait everything to come to you. I think that you can create it and sort of be clear on your purpose and what you want, take whatever those baby steps are towards it. And that keeps you motivated in terms of your mind and spirit. And I think a lot of times we. allow other people's fears to infect us and maybe prevent us doing the stuff that we really want to do. And I think that's one of the lessons I've learned now to really listen to my gut because it's never steered me wrong so far.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:That's awesome baby steps is kind of one of our general themes as well taking those baby steps towards everything you are doing and encountering in life. What are some of the most transformative? Experiences that you encountered during your voyage
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I would say a lot of my voyages were down in the South Pacific. on some small islands where you could say that the people were less affluent than some of the Western countries. I learned we're all essentially the same, regardless of the culture we grew up in, we're all essentially after looking for love and wanting to be loved. I think that is a driving force, behind everybody I met. But the other thing I learned was that Just because people do something differently in another country doesn't mean it's wrong. It's just their way and their culture, and you can learn a lot about yourself as to how you react to that. And I'll give you an example. I was down in Vanuatu on a volunteer project for the turtles. part of it was to be adopted by a local family. And my It was Mama Cecilia was my mom, who's my, for this month that I was there and I had a little girl, sister, Fabiana one day she was making bread and she was throwing flour onto this wooden bench that we would normally think is a picnic bench, but this is really like a lean to version of it. then she says, come on. And, and she started asking me questions like, where did you get your sunglasses or, How come you don't have a husband? And like these kind of like bizarre questions, right? And I said, she said, uh, I said, well, I did have one. I don't have one now. She goes, did he die? And I went, well, no, actually I got divorced. And she goes, oh, and then she had to think for a little bit. eventually she goes, well, how will you find a new one? You know what I mean? that was the family unit was so important. But anyway, so we went into the inside of this hut, which was a kitchen, and she throws on the bread and everything onto the fire and with, hot stones in her hand, puts that on. the similarities I'd noticed between her and my own mother, who used to break Bread in Ireland when I was a kid. I thought they're essentially the same human being. They're both the mothers and the center of the family, the heart of the family, if you like. coming back from places like Fiji and Vanuatu and French Polynesia, some of the smaller islands, learned that we have to adapt when we come back. Re entry is hard because first of all, you're with people who are, To me, intrinsically happy, you know, they're making, know, a fraction of the money people are making, let's say, in America, and yet they're intrinsically happy, and they seem to laugh at anything, and they laugh at nothing, and I learned that you can't interfere with their way of life in so far as, Oh, they need to know that they could have this, they could have that, because that's actually affecting how they live. And when you come back, you can't sit in a moment of guilt of thinking, you know what? I am so wealthy, both in my health and my, material possessions that I take for granted. I've seen people come back and get. depressed because they felt that they don't fit in either world. one thing I learned is you have to respect that. by an accident of birth, I could have been born into a family in Vanuatu. That could have been my life. This is the life I was given. These were the opportunities I was given, so I have to now respect that that's okay to live like this. Does that make sense?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:That makes perfect sense. I respect that viewpoint and it speaks to my next question, which is, can you talk about the role of mindfulness and self awareness in your journey and in your book?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Right. And, it comes back to the conversation that's going on in your head all the time. we all have the inner critic that sits on our, certainly I know all writers have an inner critic sitting on their shoulder saying, you know, you're a fraud. I mean, how could, who says you should be able to write a book, right? we're kinder to each other sometimes than we are to ourselves. And I think the awareness of. I remember being in Vietnam sitting in the back of a car that was supposed to be taking me to the airport and we got pulled over by the police and the driver got out. thought, okay, well, it's like, you know, in Ireland, they used to stop you for tax and insurance, you show your paperwork and off you go. Well, this went on and on and on. And they took him off to somewhere behind these trees. I didn't know until later there was actually a building back there and I still, to this day, do not know why they stopped him. I ended up, I was, I think it was the best part of an hour, if not a little longer. I was sitting there and I could feel my psyche trying to get scared, do you know? And I just thought, okay, this is, this was this fear sneaking up and I said, okay, what's going on right this moment in this second in time? And I'll tell you what it is. I'm sitting in a car. Is anybody threatening me? No. Are you safe? Yes. Is it, you know, are you away from the weather? You're fine. And then the next second, you're still fine. You know, and I think part of the mindset is if we jump forward into the future and start worrying about the what ifs, you know, this could happen, that could happen. We're not really present. And if we're not really present, we're not actually open to the whole experience that's coming our way or the gift that's in that for us, you know?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, I've adopted, rather than saying Carpe Diem, I say Carpe Momento. It's actually the title of my blog that I occasionally write. I really love that kind of mindset of just thinking in the moment and thinking about the choices that we make and how is that impacting Our future, the next steps, because whatever happened in the past happened, it brought us to where we are. And I wholly believe that good or bad circumstances in our past have brought us to the moment we're in for what we're going to do next and where it's leading us. Leading us in where it's causing us to interact with other people because that's impacting their lives down the line as well, and it's always a matter of choice, and we have that choice to be happy. I know that's a hard choice for some. they struggle. They want to be happy, but. Circumstances make it difficult I think we Americans, we want to be depressed with all that we have, you know, it's almost a choice that I shouldn't be happy because, I don't have as much as everybody else. But in reality, we have so much more than everybody else.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Oh my goodness. Yes. I totally agree with you on that. And you have to, have to like, again, first of all, one of the biggest things about traveling is it really teaches you gratitude. I think if you can live in a state of gratitude, it doesn't necessarily have to be about wealth, it can be your health, it can be anything, if we stray off that, That's when the fear starts coming in.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I'm on a personal quest to change the spelling of gratitude to have to tease. So it's an attitude of gratitude,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Love
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:so that it's more of an action rather than just a description of our feeling in the moment. we have to have that attitude of gratitude that we are actually conscious about being grateful for what we have, what we don't have, what we will eventually have if we keep working at it and so on.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Mm hmm. And you know, and there's so many different ways to tap into gratitude. I was on an airplane the other day, about a week or two ago and it wasn't going well. One of the talks I give is on, the habits that you should develop in order to make travel an opportunity for personal growth. Right? And I'm sitting there on this plane. This was, this was not going to happen. We were taking off. Literally the nose was about to come up and next thing they slammed on the brakes and it was an aborted takeoff. We were back at the gate. We're sitting there. What's going on? in that moment, I'm thinking, when I get on an airplane, things aren't always going to go according to plan. I can be grateful for all the guys that showed up, not just the crew that's on the boat, but the guys who came to fill the plane with fuel, the guys who were at the gate, checking people in. There's so many people in the street and people you don't see that are in the string of making things happen for us, for you, that we can be grateful they all got out of bed today and made it happen for us. Do you know?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Oh, absolutely. It reminds me, you speaking of Ireland, I have not traveled a lot abroad. my wife has a lot more than me. last year, we finally took a trip to Ireland, Scotland, which is, my family heritage the Armstrongs are one of the border clans of Scotland. we have Irish history and everything else. So we went into the Dublin, Glasgow, Edinburgh, and a bunch of places around there. as we were leaving Portland to fly out there, We had to go in separate flights because my son has the same first name as I do, which makes it very difficult even though we have different middle names. They can't seem to accept two Williams in a flight, reservation so we're on two different flights. So it's me and my daughter flying and my son and my wife flying separately. my daughter and I get to the airport and find out our flight was canceled. And here we are, we have to, you know, my, my wife and son are already along their way. We have to figure out how are we going to be connecting? We're going all the way to Ireland. And the woman who was working with us, I believe it was Delta Airlines. did a phenomenal job. I wish I had her name to give her props right now. But, she ended up getting us on an earlier flight, got us there sooner in a more comfortable journey And my daughter was so excited that it was like, you know, this was meant to be dad.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And then that also comes into the mindset as well in those situations rather than, you know, my phrase that I use is rather than why is this happening to me is why is this happening for me and to start looking for the gift in it. You know what I mean? And sometimes we don't know what that gift is right away. Like you didn't know immediately, but then, wow, guess what? It really worked out. You got instant, return on what it was, you got there earlier, got to spend more time, but, that's part of, for me, the gratitude, idea is that things are presented to us for some kind of gift, some lesson to learn, and I don't believe anything happens, you know, no reason.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah. And I don't believe that gift is always specifically for us. Everything that happens in our life is supposed to be for us, and if it's not good, it's a punishment of some sort. And if we really examine our whole trajectory in life, we're going to see how we've interacted with so many other people, and where choices that we've made, good or bad, have brought us to a point Maybe it doesn't seem to have impacted us, but it's impacted tons of other people. You know, moving out to Portland 16 years ago, there's been plenty of times while we've lived out here. As I look at both my wife and I took tremendous cuts in pay the opportunities that I had in previous jobs. Teaching positions that I had and where I'm at right now, it's easy to say, you know Oh, this was a stupid choice. Why do we ever move out here and just to lament the whole thing? But then as I look at it, it's like I'm not here necessarily For me, but for my kids and I look at the opportunities that my kids and I love using the term opportunity I love that you use that the opportunities that my kids have would they have had those same opportunities? Had we stayed where we were at I don't think so, my son's embarking on a career in mixed martial arts he got into wrestling because I connected with the local club One of his coaches his sophomore year was recently inducted into the UFC Hall of Fame.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Wow.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I think if he had not had all those circumstances, would he be where he's at? And so I can go on, but it's, we're here to listen to your story, not my story.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:But you're absolutely right. it's that butterfly effect, isn't it? one action here can have it. And you may never know. there was one in my book, following sunshine where I thought I was getting a job on one particular island and at the last second that wasn't available to me for whatever. And I still to this day do not know what happened or why. However, as a result, I ended up spending, five years on another island, Sark, in the Channel Islands. between UK and France, which was an idyllic lifestyle for me. three and a half miles long mile and a half wide, no cars, no airport, just accessible by ferry. And it was the most idyllic place I ever lived in terms of Having a chance to step back, from the busyness of cities but That's what came to me exactly to your point we don't know. like I said, sometimes it might not be something for us, like your move, to Portland for your kids and the effect that that's had.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:what are some practical tips you can share for individuals looking to embark on their journey of self discovery and growth?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:that's a heavy question, isn't it?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I like the heavy questions.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:exactly. can they do to embark on their own journey? I think. first step is you got to check in with yourself and find out what are you passionate about for starters. And I remember actually asking, trying to help somebody recently who was embarking on college age, and they didn't know what they wanted in life. And I said, if you imagine you're in bed. And somebody comes in and opens the curtains, all your needs are met, all your finances are taken care of, your food is met, your buildings are paid off, they open the curtains and say to you, what is it you want to do today? What is the first thing that pops into your mind? And I have found that that generally will bring out whatever that passion is. And then I say can you earn money doing that? if the answer is yes, there's your career. If the answer is no, It's your hobby. Now find some other way you can use those skill sets and have that as your hobby, you know? And so I think checking in with yourself first and trying to find what it is that excites you, what gets you out of bed a lot of times I've learned we're all in the job of service. I don't know if you remember there's a part of that book where I'm kind of going, I was all grumbly about having to wash some dishes for somebody in a, in a hostel where I was volunteering. And I was like, why didn't he wash his own damn dishes? You know? and then I, I had to do this thing overnight where I actually started dreaming about service it doesn't matter what we're doing, you know, not necessarily. the technically service industry, you know, it can be anything and we're all in service for each other. And I think once we realize that we understand what our purpose is and why we're here and what our, what our journey is, if you like, does that answer your question?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Oh, it absolutely does. Yeah, I often too, when I spell, I love spelling words differently just to emphasize their importance in our growth path. But I like putting parentheses around extra in extraordinary because a lot of times we think, you know, I have this very ordinary life. I'm a custodian or, you know, I'm just a school teacher. I'm just a, mechanic or any job that somebody might think is unexciting. In reality, there's a lot of people that would really love to have their job and don't like the celebrity or the, you know, the high stress of maybe being a CEO of a company or those types of things. And we have that opportunity to impact people at even the most seemingly mundane level. I mean, you hear so many stories of people who have been inspired by, the custodian at their school or one of their teachers. And we think we're leading this Ordinary life and it's not until down the road. We encounter somebody says hey, you know, i'm here because that one day many many years ago You said to me and I had this happen to me. I had a student who I was teaching her anatomy and it was Circumstances at the school I was teaching at the anatomy had been taught by biology department. It was cadaver based and I really digressed here, but they You They realized how much money it was costing the biology department to teach this class for our students. And so they said, we're not going to teach it anymore. And I'm like, this is crazy. My students need to have cadaver anatomy so that they can understand the body at the most intricate levels. And so I said, I'll teach it. I worked it out in a way that I could. Do it with one cadaver and do my best to give these students that experience. And as we're over the cadaver one day and was talking with one of the students and I said something about her going to med school and she said, Oh no, I'm not going to med school. I said, really? Cause I always, pictured you as going to med school. I mean, you just seen this like somebody who should be going to med school. And she was like, I've never thought. a couple years later after she graduated, she's like, I just wanted to thank you that, I'm going to med school now because of that one day that you, told me that you believed I could do it.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Brilliant, absolutely brilliant. I love that, you know, and that's the, that, and like you said, that could have been just a throw off remark sometimes, know, I was just thinking what you were talking about while we're playing with words, you started it first, right?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I always start things.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:But I think. That one word, just, we could take that out of our vocabulary, Because that just puts a derogatory, attitude on stuff, doesn't it? I'm just this, I'm just that, you know, if we could get rid of the word just, I think, I am this, I am that, I am going to do this, I am doing this, I think that would make a big difference. you reminded me of, a guy, I worked in the hospitality business at one point down in Key Largo I was just after coming out of a Breakup that I really thought was going to be that one. and, and this, I was really boo hoo stage, right? It was the night shift and the bellman comes over to me and he goes, you know what, we were born by ourselves and we're going to die by ourselves. So get over it. And I kind of thought, Hmm, yeah, at that stage, you're always looking for the one who you're going to marry, who you're going to be with, later in life, I realized I had married the wrong person for me. Because there had been no divorce in Ireland, I couldn't give myself permission to leave the marriage until eventually one day, one counselor said to me, I'm not telling you this is the right decision for you. You have to make your own decision. But if it is your decision, wait one more day? to be happy. And that was like giving me the key to get out of jail. You know, it suddenly allowed me to give permission to myself. Now I've since kept in touch with her, but there are instances and people like that in our lives that pass through and we pass through other people's lives and might have said something like you did to your student. And we've no idea the impact it's going to have on them.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I think so often about the timing of circumstances. I was working in New York. near Rockefeller Center My now wife was working within blocks of where I was working at the time. And we very likely cross paths on those sidewalks in New York City at some point in those couple years and we never met. And it wasn't until I was in Michigan, working at Eastern Michigan University. She was working for a company headquartered in Western Michigan, and they were trying to pressure her to take a promotion. And she's trying to convince herself that there's no single guys in Michigan and finding excuse not to take the promotion. We were both on Match. com. She's in Virginia. I'm in Michigan she came across my profile and there was something that caught her attention She put it aside but it kept coming back to her. finally she sent me a message saying, Hey, came across your profile too bad. We'll probably never meet. I just wanted to say, I like your smile or whatever it was. I wrote back, well, you never know. My dad just moved on. They had lived in New York for a while. And then they moved down, his wife took a position in the DC area and they were living in Arlington, just miles from where Pam was living. And I was going down that summer. So I said, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my dad just moved down there. And so we started chatting back and forth and really hit it off, I visited later that August. We had the five days I was down there. We went out four times. She met my dad on the second day, and on the second date, I was at dinner with my dad and his wife, and she wanted to do something. And I said, why don't you have dinner with us? And I'm like, what am I thinking? You know, and my dad's kind of, he was kind of a funny, crazy guy. I mean, and, What damage could they do to this relationship? And I got back from that dinner and my dad's like, don't F this up. He said, she's a keeper. And my dad never uses that word. And so when he underscored it with that word, it was like, okay. Yeah, this is something I got to keep pursuing. And so it was like, what were the chances? And if we had met earlier, again, going back to where are my kids at now? I would have had different kids. They had to be in different circumstances. And so we can never really question what has happened in our lives and for what purpose, other than what are we going to do with it now going forward?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:a hundred percent agree with you on that.'cause I was gonna ask you that question. Um, if you, if you had to met, you know, maybe you passed each other in the, in the street in New York originally, but had you met at that point, you may not have been at the right stages in your life to actually make that connection and actually be together and bring what you, because, because what's, what's molding us up to that point? I know.'cause it's the exact same experience. I've just been through, you know, I am now with. The person I'm supposed to be with and it didn't happen in my twenties or thirties or forties or fifties well back in the fifties, actually, and so I know, I mean, people have said to us, Oh, my God, you know, why didn't you meet sooner? look at all that time and I'm gone. I wasn't ready. And he wasn't ready. And we wouldn't have what we have now had we met sooner, because we both had to go through our own individual stories, if you like, and experience our own experience to become the human beings we are today. And I know for a fact, I'm a better human being today than I would have been 10 years ago, through experiences and learning and like the self discovery and the journeys that we go on and be kinder to myself too. But. There's a very distinct possibility. And in actual fact, both he and I, Gary and I do talks on, celebrity cruises. one of our talks is finding meaning through traveling. And we start off with this map of the world and like, how is this guy who grew up in Los Angeles and this girl who grew up in Ireland, how come we're standing together on the same stage? And we start doing it with the map, like all the different places that I had been and where was I? Well, volunteering off in Peru. I was over in Vanuatu. I was in Kenya. I was here. And so eventually at the end of the talk, there's that moment where I was called back to LA Gary was, we had this picture where Gary was actually walking the docks in Marina del Rey, looking to buy a boat, and then the picture shows these buildings around Marina del Rey. And I said, and guess where I was people. And I was in that building right there, you know? And I, and so did we meet then? No, we didn't. It was another. No, it was another six or eight years before we actually met. Do
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Oh, wow.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:story, you know, walking down the same side of the street. It wasn't meant to be at that point in our lives.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:So I'm going to ask you this question early, and I hadn't necessarily planned on asking it, but it's one of those questions and I get a feel for Person I'm talking to and it's a question I've been asked a lot if you could go back in time and change one thing in Your life, what would you change?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Ooh, that is a very, very tough question. That really is a tough question and not to make it too trite, but I think what I would change is I would listen to my instincts earlier. I'm trying to think, you know, I mean, yes, I could turn around and say, well, I wouldn't have married that person. I wouldn't have gone here. I wouldn't have taken that job. You know, all those little bits and pieces. I think I would try to, not try, I don't like the word try, I would, I would have listened sooner and stuck to my guns on some things, I think, but that said. To the other point is, had I changed anything, I wouldn't have this existence now and I really like this existence I have right now. it's a very tough question, How do you answer it?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I answer nothing You know It's like I wouldn't change a thing because even from the standpoint and I've had others that'll say kind of same thing I would I would want to you know, get to this thought process earlier change my mindset earlier I don't even think I would do that There were times I needed to be the idiot that I was in life to learn the lessons, to not interact with certain people, or to You know, have some of those what people might regret, but have those life lessons that got me to where I'm at right now. I mean, cause certainly if, if I made some of these decisions earlier, woke my brain up a little bit earlier, maybe, Pam and I would have been in a position to be together would have been almost 25,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Mm
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:30 years ago.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:hmm.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I wouldn't have a 16 year old and 18 year old. I'd have probably a, 30 year old, 28 year old, right?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I answer that as just kind of nothing. I have to accept that everything that happened in the past is for the purpose of getting me where I am this moment and for the decisions that I have to go further. A friend does this 12 week, transformation program for fitness and she has a number of different speakers that have come on. And since COVID it's gone, more virtual. And so it's kind of neat to be able to meet people from all over. one of the speakers she had on is a woman who was an early medalist in women's wrestling. she competes in the UFC and she just gave this phenomenal talk. I bet if I ask her this question, she's going to come back with the nothing answer. And so I asked her the question and of course, that's what she said. Nothing. I wouldn't have these two wonderful kids
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Mm hmm.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I had
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Mm
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:anything in the past. And we got off the call. My friend was like, Did you know her back story? And I said, no, what are you talking about? she said, she grew up in a really rough family life. I mean, there was drug addictions and, you know, abusiveness and all those kinds of things. And so you look at somebody like that, that, yeah, there are so many things that it would make sense to say, I'm going to change these things, but to recognize that if I change those things, then I'm not going to be where I'm at right now. I wouldn't have the kids that I have. I wouldn't have the wonderful, in her case, husband that I have right now. Things would be too different It wouldn't be the life I'm supposed to have.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And that question has been posed to me slightly differently before, what do you regret? And at that stage, I remember answering that like, well, nothing, you know, again, like the same concept, you wouldn't change anything. And it was posed to me at the time was, well, that's actually quite arrogant. And I'm like, do you figure that's arrogant? It's like that you didn't regret anything. Therefore, um, yes, you're admitting to mistakes you make. Cause I think obviously we make mistakes. That's part of our journey too, is the learning from those. but, and to, to that point as well, don't regret the things that brought me pain. that respect, you know, and again, to that point, like your life is what it is. you can't change the past. The only thing you can change is today. in two seconds you can change, but you can't do anything yet for 10 minutes time, you know? Um, but it's interesting you came at that at a, I think it's a similar question, but it's slightly different way of asking, isn't it?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:And I agree with that. You can't have regrets. you're not dismissing the thing you did, but you understand that both you and the person you affected have grown from that in some way.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I have a friend who is a regular listener to this podcast, so I can mention Jay. We mentioned him a few times in this podcast before.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Jay.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Jay and I reconnected through Facebook, about a year or more ago. And, he ended up, he, Jay's got, he's been deaf as long as I knew him. And he's got other health issues and some things like that. And, so, And he's losing his sight. And so we were kind of communicating back and forth, either through messaging and Facebook, or, maybe we were texting one another, but he's a, Hey, you know, can, can you just, would you mind just calling me? It's a lot easier to just talk on the phone. So I call him and, we're chatting we talked almost every week for several weeks after that. And we still, you know, pretty regularly call, but he's like, I'm trying to put a face to. we were in the same homeroom for four years in high school, too. And, and he was like, Yeah, I don't think you were one of the ones that picked on me when we were younger. I said, Well, Jay, as a matter of fact, I was.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Oh.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:but that's all in the past. And that's how he looked at it. we're different now you've grown. everybody grows up and he has a really great attitude about that. And, you know, what I wish that I had not. said or did some of the things that I've done in the past I have lead in my hand from picking on a kid in eighth grade. Well, I'm going to sound like a really, really nasty person here, but, um, I have lead in my hand from picking on this kid that was sitting behind me, and, he stabbed me with his pencil. That lead is still in my hand. And so I use that to point out to my kids about, you know, making funny kids or picking on kids, and it ends up that, you know, years later, I have a friend who I met when I was in Texas. She's from Arizona. She posted a picture on Facebook and I'm like, I know him and I asked who it was and sure enough it was the same kid that I went to high school with he was now her chorus director in Arizona and it's like you never know what paths are crossing and how you're influencing different people at different times in our lives to look back and have regrets it's like Yeah, I should have disappointment with myself for how I behaved, but that just means I need to behave differently now and going forward, not that I have to sit there and lament. I wish I could do this over again.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Right. Right. Absolutely. Because that puts you into a negative space
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Mm
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:not helpful to anybody. And I know one of the things, for me, I'm not sure if it's in this book, about, whenever two people meet, a sale is made. Either Mr. Grumpy will drag down Mr. Happy to his level or Mr. Happy will bring Mr. Grumpy up to their level. Do you know what I mean?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:hmm.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:how we interact. And we can all have terrible days and terrible moods and pains and everything else. And we do give off an aura about us. And, you know, people say, well, I don't even want to be in the same room as you today, you know? Um, and I, and I think that you can't live in that past and, and how we show up on a daily basis does affect not just our own health, but the people around us. know, and I, and I do know that if I'm in a grumpy space, it's not doing me any good, for starters, and it certainly isn't doing anybody around me any good. So I can't, it can happen, but I can't live there, if that makes sense.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah. So I think I've kind of Had this question almost answered, but I'm going to ask it anyhow, just to maybe give you an opportunity to ask or to address some more specific stories, but can you share a memorable story or encounter from one of your journeys that has had a significant impact on you?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Ooh, yes, um, one of the volunteer projects I did was in the Kingdom of Tonga. it was for an Australian family who ran a swim with the whale business. They used to bring photographers out to swim with the humpback whales when they came up from Antarctica during the birthing season, the calving season. And they had two teenage children who were enrolled in Australian distance learning, by the time, and this was a tiny little island where they were now stationed, um, uh, but I don't see, there's like about 400 people, villagers on it, but they. We're enrolled in the distance learning. By the time I got there, they had moved off the boat and were trying to create this, land base. And when I got there, the dad said, well, the distance learning isn't working because the nearest internet is like an eight hour sail away to another island. I said, like, well, what are we going to do? And he goes, well, Welcome to homeschooling. And I'm like, did you realize I'm not a teacher? You know? So anyway, we overcame a bunch of different things. And, and I, you know, when you're, when you're out of resources, you get resourceful and you come up with all sorts of ideas, how to do things. But what I learned from those kids, all of us have this mindset now, that, we should take care of our planet and we need to live a sustainable life and take care of everything around us, these kids weren't learning about sustainability. They were actually living it. they were hunting and fishing and they were putting food on the table. These were teenagers. after about two years after I was black in the land of the living, if you like, back in America at that point. the young boy was killed in a road accident. I've never felt so much pain for one family because they had created this existence. There was the two parents and the two children, a boy and a girl. they were the tightest knit family I'd ever met. they were so brave in everything they did. to lose one of their own was just devastating. And in fact, you know, I dedicate a portion of the royalties for, following sunshine to the charity that they're building something in his honor on the shores of Namooka. But you think that's bad? In 2022, were luckily off island when the volcano erupted and the tsunami literally washed away every stick and stone that they had put together on that side of the island. And his mother, who's a beautiful photographer and artist, had said to me in a message one day, she said, it's like as though we lost him all over again. Like every coconut he climbed was gone. You know what I mean? Every, every stick that he whittled was gone. I think that had a huge effect on me to understand the kind of sadness they were going through, how they were keeping going. it really put tone to me that You do have to live in the moment. You do have to live every day. You've got to pick up that phone. And ironically enough, I was there, it was about 14 months after my mother died. And there was one day I got really, really sad and upset and I hadn't any clue why. And it turned out I had all this unresolved grief because at the time she died, I was, practical. I was okay, this, this, this, we'll get through it and it's fine. I was glad that she wasn't in pain and She had died. But I hadn't actually processed how I felt about it. And that happened to me on that little island. And then so for a couple of years later to find out they were going through that kind of pain was just very bizarre for me, you know, but that, that definitely living with that family had a huge impact on me.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:So when you travel, how do you balance the physical demands of travel with maintaining your health and well being?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:That's a very good point because, a lot of times on a plane, we're not eating the kind of food we want to eat. We're, not getting the exercise we want to do. obviously try as much walking as you can do. I did have a time to down in Kenya to go with, wild fitness. I'm not sure if you're familiar with it, but it was a girl who she actually did a lovely TEDx talk on it, who found that people came out of the cities and would come down to what time, which is on, on the coast there in Kenya. She developed this whole fitness program, which was fitness in the wild, literally. you never went into a gym. It taught you how to climb trees hang out of trees and run barefoot on the sand. I learned you don't need a dumbbell to get strength training. And you can find a lot of different ways. There was, when I was living on the boat that I'm not sure if you're familiar with sailboats, but when you come up from down below, it's called a companion way. So there's like three or four steps up onto the. to the cockpit area, and there's a hatch that slides across there to keep out the weather when you're in weather. And it became a great hang bar. You could actually hang from that and you could do pull ups and push ups, so you can find places no matter where you are, even in a hotel room that doesn't have a gym or something like that. You can find places to try and work out. And excuse me, but the an eye on the food intake is, can be difficult. Like in some of the islands, we had to. Terrible time trying to find fresh vegetables, certainly. I mean, our main staple of food here is egg and avocado for breakfast, and a salad for lunch, every single day. trying to find lettuce in the Bahama islands was just impossible, So you try to adapt and get your greens wherever you can. So it can be tricky, but if you're a little bit of planning and a little bit checking things out ahead of time, you know, you can try and keep on track.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, sometimes you have to just let go of that too. I think for our own well being you know, I'm in this area. I'm not going to be gone for too long. it's different if you're going to be spending several years in a different culture. But like I was talking about going to Ireland, Scotland, I had to go off my diet a little bit and honestly, I wanted to because it's like, I'm not going to be there that often and this is the food of the area, I was a little disappointed with the fish and chips. I did not have as good of fish and chips as I would like,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Oh,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:daughter and I found a restaurant in Dublin where we had a traditional Irish breakfast, which is not what I would have for breakfast,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:no,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:it was so good. And I don't eat pork and
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:neither.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I say, okay, I'm going to have these sausages. Cause how much is it going to hurt me? You know, it might. Set me back, an hour or so if I have to, run to the restroom, but I'm gonna eat this meal. It was so good. And this has been a couple years and we still talk about that. So, you know, you enjoy that. It's just, you don't make the bad habits again. You just, you know, It's try and do the best with what you have and, adapt to what's available you don't put yourself in misery because you can't have the perfect healthy diet. Sometimes we have to be a little unhealthy.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah, you're absolutely right. and also if you throw mindset in on top of that, I dunno whether, you know, your mind tells your body, Hey, this is a short term thing. I'm not normally going to eat like a rash or an egg and a sausage and a black and white pudding for breakfast. but it's not gonna kill me either.'cause I'm just doing it this once time and then suddenly, okay, your body kind of handles it, using what's there. And the local, obviously local fruits and vegetables, whatever. I mean, at this point now. I think I know how to cook zucchini six ways to Sunday because like in the islands I was one of the few vegetables we could get, but yeah, you're absolutely right. Embrace it for what it is and then move back into what feels good.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:in what ways has writing this book changed your perspective on life and aging?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Well, interestingly enough, It's been from first line to publication, I thought I would mention, has been eight years. And I mean, the publishing industry, as you know, is a slow industry for the most part. But the, I wrote a book in between times and that got picked up to be published first. That was flares up about the two lads who rode across the ocean in, the Atlantic in a, in a little rowboat. the process of writing this has been a growth journey in that respect, because The first draft was knock out the story, get it down. And then I had to go, sat for a while, and I had to go back and really look at it again and see, well, instead of just, I don't, I didn't want it to be a travelogue or I didn't want it just to be my story. I wanted it to be a useful tool for other people that if they could identify with it. I would go back and I would look at certain scenes and say, okay, well, what, What was the lesson to pull out of that? Or what was the experience that I had that might be relatable to somebody else? so from that point of view, the process of that eight year process, if you like, from start to finish, taught me about persistence that if you can keep going and even that with in aging, like for instance, I have trouble with sciatica now, for instance, which is a real pain, as you can imagine. and now I know that yes, that's going to keep coming back unless I do my exercises that stretches this, that, and the other. And yesterday or day, no, a couple of days back, I'm working on the computer. And all of a sudden I've lost the feeling in my two fingers, you know, the ring finger and the, and the little finger. And now apparently I've got another nerve trapped somewhere, you know, those kinds of little things in terms of aging. I really have to pay attention, you know? And so I was told, sleep with your arms straight. And I went, okay. So I've been doing that for the last couple of days to see. writing the book for me was that journey to say, could I? My life story helps somebody else and could it also teach somebody that it's never, too late, no matter how old we feel we are, we, you know, we, I mean, I felt I was older 30 and here I am a little bit older than that now. I never put off a dream. like you said, live every day in gratitude, try and eat healthily, work out and, keep your body fit and healthy Gary and I have given ourselves a promise to each other, just because we want to spend a lot more time together, is that we're trying to stay healthy, not just for ourselves, but also for each other. because we want to be around together a long time. We feel that, we've got stuff to do. And I'll tell you one thing about finally meeting the right person for me is as a result of this relationship, I have become a better version of myself.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:that's really great. And I think that's the measure of what a great relationship is. And I think that's why the book is both entertaining and inspiring. oftentimes we don't get both in anything that we might read, but when it's more purposeful where it is intended To take our stories and to use that to inspire people, then that's where it really captures us. I think you might have already answered this question. But what advice would you give to someone who feels stuck and uninspired in their current life situation?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Right. kind of, kind of did touch on it a little bit about being in the bedroom and opening the curtains, to find your purpose and purpose can be a big life purpose, but it also can be a need to cross the street. I think to become unstuck, first maybe identify what does stuck mean to you? You know, what does that actually mean? Does it mean you're not where you think you ought to be? Or you think you're not where you should be? Or you're bored with where you're at. You're not being challenged. You're not challenging yourself. the creativity is not coming through. so I think defining stuck first for what's stuck for you, for me, stuck would be, not learning something new every day and not fulfilling my ultimate mission. My ultimate mission is to make somebody laugh every day. The beauty of that purpose and mission in life is that I can never, fail because by the end of the night, if I go through my laugh list, what was funny today? who did I make laugh today? Oh, nobody. Oh, there's a bad day, but before the end of the night, before I go to sleep, I can make myself laugh. I can tell myself a joke or whatever. So I can never fail at this mission. So that's my newest mission in life is to make somebody laugh every day.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I always make myself laugh. Nobody laughs at my jokes, but I can make myself laugh all the time. So
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah, I
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I do that pretty well
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I call myself auto amused, there was a time when I was first on the sailboat with Gary and I was in the little quarter berth and had a door and he was up in the forward cabin and I would be like going through my laugh list and I would be like cackling away and he goes. You do realize I can hear you in there and you do sound quite crazy. know,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Well, i'm kind of at the point now in the interview where i'll ask you the question We ask of all our guests, Can you define how you define? What it means to age well, and what are you doing personally to age well?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:aging well to me means you feel like you're living a fulfilled life and that you have a reason to get up and that you're in service both for yourself and to somebody else and to feel that sense of fulfillment and that sense of joy. both aging in mind and body. I think that's all together. And again, it comes right back to that whole concept of gratitude, in terms of aging physically well, where we've already decided I'm decrepit. Now I've got a sciatica nerve going on. I've got a lumbar nerve going, and they're on the opposite side of my body. which doesn't help at all. I can do an awful lot more in terms of aging. Well, now I'm really working on food and diet and intake and getting our exercise on a regular basis. while I have impacts that are hard on the ground I'm trying to get into the pool and do some, bootcamp here in water aerobics. It's not just la la la la la. There's one that's like serious bootcamp water aerobics, which I really love. Because I'm, I love the water. I mean, I swam and I used to teach scuba diving and everything. So I love being in the water.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Sounds like you are aging well.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Well, what is it? Don't they do a test to tell you what your biological age is versus your chronological age?
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, that's an opportunity for me to plug True Diagnostics, who is one of, we're an affiliate of them, and we actually can offer a discount. It's a 12 percent discount for their testing, we had, their co founder. on an episode recently I did the test and they went through all of my, my scores, which I found out I am aging well, which is good. And, I have her coming up on a upcoming episode, probably bearing an early September. They've just kind of expanded what they do and actually do. It's at 11 Oregon. biological clock. So it's, you know, biological clock of each of these 11 organ systems, and call it its symphony age. So I'm really anxious to learn a little bit more about that, because I was kind of surprised when where I'm older, like my musculoskeletal, I scored 65 and I'm 61. And that's like, that's my strong suit. I'm,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Ah.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:pretty strong for my age. I lift right weights regularly. My cardiovascular, I do a little less than I probably should. I've been working on that. But yeah, that inflammation and metabolic were the areas that I scored the worst in. And so I'm kind of curious, what's that really meaning? I get some shoulder issues going on. I have to sleep a certain way to minimize some of the pain. I do get periods of sciatica, so you're not alone there. And I've kind of always had that. little thing that we can do now to get an idea for how our bodies are adjusting and changing. if we make a change, is it having a positive effect? Because that's the whole purpose of it. It's not like, oh, wow, I'm, 55 years old biologically, but I'm, chronologically 61. It's more, okay, I'm doing these things. Are they making me healthier? Are they allowing me To age better physiologically so yeah, it's kind of funny that you brought that up
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:so when you get your scores, do they then say, okay, well, this is an area where clearly you're aging. like you said, the difference between muscle and cardiovascular, you're aging well here. Here's what we suggest this area. You're not aging so well. Here's what we suggest you do to improve that.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I think they could do a little bit better with the suggestion pieces of it and I think that's kind of the hard part. And that's where we're still kind of in those early stages of understanding epigenetics and, how the body ages. We're recording this on, uh, August 19th. I'm trying to think what date this will actually air live, but, um, yesterday, the 18th, we went live with an episode with Dr. Matt, Caberline, who is probably, I would argue, the leading authority on longevity.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I listened to him yesterday.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah. So, and he's much more of the biologist, but it was fun interviewing him because he does have a lot more of that broader perspective. we talk in that episode about how I refer in all my classes about, Exercise science being biomechanical, psychosocial, that we have to really include all of those things in regards to aging well. it's not just about longevity and living longer, it's what's contributing to that quality of life that we are living. And the more I look into this whole idea of aging well, I'm seeing that this psychological piece needs to be included as well. if we're not focused on our well being, the spiritual, intellectual, emotional, and social, as well as the physical, we might live longer, but what's the quality of those years?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Absolutely.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:cartoons that talk about, yeah, you did all this, this, and this to live longer, but what's the point, you know?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Gary tells this story about, I don't want to classify this the wrong way, but it was like for somebody who has done everything their entire life, right? They've worked out, they've eaten absolutely correctly, never put a bad thing into their body, right? And they're going to be really upset with themselves, when they're a hundred years old, dying of nothing.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:But, yeah, and the other part of that too is, there's two sides. one of my aunts had, Alzheimer's or a version of dementia for nine years where, you know, she was starting to recognize people, but her body was fine. And then you have people who are sharp as a whip and yet their body is failing them. it's like a seesaw, it's kind of like, well, I'd rather you know, with both parts intact for a period of time. Quality of time, rather than be 103.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, we talk about that too. we define kind of the four ages. There's the first age of dependence leading through high school, college, depending on when we break those ties of dependency with family and kind of get off on her own. The second age is when we're working. We're productive. We're having families. We're doing all those types of things, preparing for retirement. Third age is where we're kind of in that stage of retirement and. Being hopefully fiscally sound, being healthy, being able to kind of enjoy the fruits of all our life's labor. And then fourth age is that age of decrepancy and decline.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:And ultimately, we really want that fourth age to be a matter of, ideally, minutes, if possible.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:trying to say,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:You know?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I hear you.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I would hope that my dying breaths are going to be a little bit longer so I can maybe say goodbye to people, you know? It's not like I'm just going to Keel over with a heart attack and suddenly die,
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Right.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:We want as painless as possible. We want to live a full and fulfilling life for a long period of time. But if we're not preparing financially, and then we have this very long Prolonged life, eventually things are going to break down as well. And so there's a lot more that goes into aging well, how long we want to live, and what quality of life we want to have it's that balance, of quality and quantity that goes into how we age well.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:and you're looking really good. So you're aging great. Yeah. Yeah.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:that was the funny thing in my interview with Hannah Wendt she said, often when we are talking to people about their results, we're not talking about people that have such good results. and yet, people who want these tests are always asking, what can I do better? that's kind of where I'm at with it how can I change my diet? How can I live a little bit better so that I have better relationships, you know, have More fulfillment in life and doing all those types of things. And so we can always get a little bit better. when I talk about well centered fitness, I refer to it as an asthma tope that it is something we're always targeting toward getting to the center of that target. We never get quite there and we make changes in our lives. We start getting closer and closer to that target. ideally we're working in all those five dimensions, getting those more and more refined as we progress to the stages of life, but we can always improve. There's always things that we can do better. sometimes we get really better at one area, but neglect other areas in the process You know, we just had the Olympics. I guarantee that the majority of those Olympians are not. perfectly well balanced. They had to give up social relationships. They may have, lost a little bit financially in terms of preparing for the Olympics. they train hard. Anybody who is an elite athlete knows that your body takes a lot of abuse to get to the level of training, except maybe that break dancer that we keep hearing about. her life is set now. She's like become a meme and She's laughing at all of us. I think we're laughing at her. I love her story. But, you know, we, we need to kind of be focused in on trying to get better in all those different dimensions and balancing those outs and, balancing those out improving our lives rather than just going with the flow.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Agreed. And being mindful and purposeful about, your choices, I
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Purposeful, and I always write Purpose with a capital P to think of that more universal purpose. Conscious aging, all these things have been coming up a lot more in this Aging Well podcast and I think that's where I tend to focus. I mean, I appreciate a lot of stuff that Dr. Kaeberlein talked about in terms of the biological things that we can do, but. That alone isn't going to get us to where we need to be to be aging. Well, we need the psychological and sociological sides of it as well.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:For sure.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:what future projects or ventures are you planning? how do they continue along this theme that you're exploring following sunshine?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Well, I'm full time. I've got another book coming out next year, which I'm curating a group of short stories from a total of nine authors. I started this writer's workshop for, back in 2020. So I meet monthly Zoom because it's a very difficult industry actually getting published my goal was to bring everybody along so they'd all be traditionally published. So that's coming out in May. rather than sit in the office now and start from scratch to start to finish with another book that would take literally a year of sitting of typing, um, Um, speaking of age and Gary and I have a 14 year age difference between us. So he's 14 years older than I am. we're very conscious of where we are at the stages in our lives. we want to create as much time as we can, which is why one of the things we do is give talks on cruise ships we're back on the water and we're both sharing our stories that is helpful and inspiring and talk about falling sunshine and flares up and various different books. at the same time, we're on the water, which is where we met, where we'd love to be. And guess what? There's another captain has to worry about the weather. There's somebody else in the galley cooking our dinners, you know, so we're absolutely loving that way of life. And we made the decision to bring, we had a very near miss under, the boat in 21, I believe it was, um, where I had to go under the boat while we were in the middle of the ocean and try and free the propeller from a big, under. a big line, you know, like fishing line that got caught on it didn't go very well and I got ended up hypothermic and he thought he'd lost me and I wasn't attached to the boat anymore. So big old drama. shortly after that, we made that decision and said, well maybe our time is done in terms of living full time on the boat. maybe it's time to come back ashore and take it a little bit slower. So we actually brought the sailboat back to America and we sold her. now we ended up with this great base. where we were based in Florida, that's on the water and we've got a little runaround boat so we can go out in the boat and we're really concentrating on creating that kind of a lifestyle that's well for us, that we can exercise together. We can, you know, have, have our lunches. We have breakfast meetings every morning. He's now the business manager of the writer on the water, which is my byline and, we're spending time together. And I think that has been huge difference, you know, in terms of aging well and trying to get, you know, given and received seven hugs a day, which is very important for our mental and emotional psyche rather than my shutting myself away and writing another book right at this moment, we're working with being together and writing, I'm doing smaller short stories and articles and stuff like that.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, when you were presented to me, and I believe it was maybe one of your publicists or something like that reached out to us about having you on the podcast, it's like absolutely I got to have this woman on here because this is a story about aging well.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Thank
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:And so I hope a lot of people really listen to this conversation, get inspired by it, and realize that whatever stage they are in life. you can jump into it and it's what do we do next that is going to be our story, you know.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Yeah. part of the things that has helped me cause I've reinvented myself five different careers in my life. part of that has helped me is to really buy into anything as possible.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:So Niamh, this has been a truly fascinating conversation where can our listeners find out more about you? Where can they find the book? Do you have a web page, social media?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:The best place to reach me and find out where the books are, is on the website, thewriteronthewater. com. which is a lot easier to spell than my name. So it's www. thewriteronthewater. com and I'm on all the usual social media, Instagram LinkedIn X and all that good stuff.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:you're a bigger person than me for that.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I resisted for so long and I'm like, I need to find a seven year old to teach me how to use it.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Yeah, if I ever decide to branch into that, then I'll pull my daughter into this and
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Right,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:help me because I have no clue about TikTok.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Oh, I've tried three times does my head in, but again, talk about aging. Well, you've got to just say, okay, just because it's not, what you're used to, you've got to relearn and retool. So I'm at.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:is there anything else you want to add to the conversation that we forgot to talk about?
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:I think we covered quite a little bit. I think your listeners were like, okay, okay. she can go away now.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I'm sure they're just hungry for more. So if you are listening and you're hungry for more, then go out and buy that book, Following Sunshine. it is a great book. I have not read it. in as much detail as I like. I just have not had the time yet. But, what I've read and as I've kind of skimmed through it's a fascinating journey. And I think it's really great that, you have published this and as Liam Neeson described it, it is a truly brave, enriching memoir. people need to Experience this epic global journey of aging well and find their role in it, because I think that's the purpose of your book is not only to tell your story, but to engage the rest of us in finding our own voyage of, as you said, around the mind, around the world and around the heart, we may not travel around the world like you have, but we can certainly travel around the world. our local worlds and engage with one another and really find how we belong and connect within this this world as we are attempting to age well.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:Absolutely. And just to add one thing for people, and I said, it's never too late, Gary learned how to sail at 68, bought the boat and decided he would take off for foreign shores. when he was 72, he got certified as a scuba diver for the first time on his birthday. So you know what I mean? So you, it's never too late to learn a new skill or to go for it. And I think that has kept him. Aging well.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:Well that's the hope for me then, because I have so many things that I can't do yet. I shouldn't say can't because I tell my kids they cannot use the word can't. I had a pastor when I was up in New York he was an old farmer from Oklahoma and he was raised, his father always taught him, can't never done nothing. I use that with my students, with my kids. that word can't, if you use it, you're just locking yourself into failure because you're not going to, in fact, you're not even locking yourself into failure because you got to fail, you have to try something. And if you say you can't. Then you're never going to even try and there's no, no. Shame and failure. I tell my kids go, go forward and fail
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:hmm.
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:if you're failing, you're trying new things and you're growing and you're getting better. And so I love the fact that he stepped into those things at 68. So I'm 61. I have plenty of opportunity as long as I keep attempting to age well and keep myself healthy to try new things.
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:do you realize we've aged at least an hour in the last conversation, but we've done it well,
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:I feel like I've gotten younger in this conversation. So
niamh-mcanally--the-writer-on-the-water_1_08-19-2024_145719:we
jeff_1_08-19-2024_115523:yes, so we've. Benjamin buttoned this whole thing to the end. we'll just close out with telling you to keep aging well
Thank you for listening. I hope you benefited from today's podcast. Until next time, keep aging well.
